Chick-fil-A Cows Petition for Beef to be Thanksgiving Turkey Substitute

Bring Relationship Intelligence to Thanksgiving

The CFA cows recently spoke out about their frustrations with turkey as a beef substitute outside Thanksgiving. As one cow stated, “Turkey needs to stay in their lane. We don’t need turkey bacon, turkey burgers, turkey spaghetti. Enough already!” The cows went on to explain their concerns with turkey taking over the dinner table outside of Thanksgiving. 

While normally a champion of beef substitutes like chicken, the CFA cows cited a recent fallout with their Angus, Hereford and Kobe families, that has changed their tune about eating beef. A representative from the Angus family stated, “Those CFA cows are actually dairy cows. Nobody’s gonna eat those scrawny things. I’m tired of them representing the beef community. Stop speaking for all of us!”

A beef between beef. Go figure. At Insight, our mission is to help leaders love life at work and love life at home. While we recognize that there is no substitute for spending time with family at Thanksgiving, we also acknowledge that we’d like to substitute the tension at family gatherings. 

Past experiences with certain family members, either good experiences or bad ones, create expectations for the next time you gather with those specific loved ones. If your past experiences were bad, the stage is set for potential tension and conflict. Perhaps you sense it with that worrisome feeling you have in the pit of your stomach as you approach the door, casserole in hand. 

If you anticipate a negative or tense experience this Thanksgiving, would you be willing to dig deeper into that relationship? Seek to understand how they are wired up, what motivates or drives them. Evaluate your own MVS (Motivational Value System - if you’ve taken the SDI 2.0) in comparison to your family member(s). Might this be an opportunity to recast that past experience with your new understanding? It could be the differences you have are simply a matter of what motivates you vs. what motivates your family member. Then, decide to master the moment and bring the right strength to your Thanksgiving celebration.

Perhaps, you don’t anticipate any tense relationships at your Thanksgiving gathering. If so, that’s great! Enjoy the turkey, dressing, mashed potatoes, rolls, and every other carb attached to the season. May the football and football (world cup) gods smile upon you and your team, unless you are playing my Cowboys. Regardless of what the CFA cows think, I welcome the turkey come Thursday!!
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A few tips:

• Download the Core Strengths app and pull it out when you need to find a way to reframe your conversation at the family gathering.

• Remember to be grateful in the midst of what is frustrating.

• Remember to watch to cheer for the Cowboys!

• Remember to watch the World Cup.

• Call us next week to keep your development journey rolling.

Keep in mind, if you are exhausted and drained at work, then you’re probably not at your best when you get home. Certainly, that could have implications for your Thanksgiving celebration. Consider one or more of the following to improve your leadership so that you can love life at work and love life at home.
 
Three Opportunities to Consider [learn more: ryan@insightlg.com]

1. Our next Courageous Leaders Executive Experience to help leaders rest, think and prepare to lead well is around the corner. Distilled coming March 8-10, 2023. See more info below.

2. Executive Development: Sign up for executive coaching.

3. Manager Development: Register your managers for our Courageous Manager’s Virtual Cohort launching in the Spring 2023. Watch for new dates coming soon.

Ricky Bobby Leadership 101: Understanding Success that Matters

Thousands of years ago humans were very similar to how we are today. The following statements from Ricky Bobby continue to ring true through the ages.

• "I don’t know what to do with my hands." Name one person that can’t relate!

• "If you're not first, you’re last."

These statements ring true from the ball field to the conference room. These statements also impact our ability to lead.
 
The first one is obvious. Do I hold a cup, put my hands in my pocket, put them in the air like I just don’t care … It’s important to know how to present and what to do with your hands. (We can provide presentation coaching if you need it.) The more pressing issue for me is the second statement and how it impacts everything we do. If we're not first, we're last.
 
A few weeks ago, on a cool Saturday morning, there was a heated soccer match in the Fayetteville Recreational Soccer League for girls 5 and under. Picture 4 girls who are 4- and 5-years old competing for the opportunity to get snacks at the end of the intense competition. This story helps me believe that God is real and active in our lives. The opponents coach stood about 6 feet tall and weighed in around 263 pounds. He was actively moving on the field to try and motivate and coach his girls to victory.

Then, it happened. He began to turn his comments towards the other coaches (my wife and sister-in-law) and then he turned his comments towards the 5-year-old girl on our team who was unstoppable on that day. She couldn’t miss the goal! The coach knew that Ricky Bobby was right and could see the local news stations' headlines before they were written about his big loss. He began trying to stand in her way to block the goal and that didn’t work. He began to talk down to the little girl and that didn’t work. Coaches and dad stepped in. Then I stepped in to make sure local news outlets didn’t have a real reason to join us that day.
 
If you're not first, you’re last!
 
Some people can become a bit insane; they can lose themselves in the pursuit of winning. The key is to make sure we know what a “win” actually is. The opponent's coach could have celebrated a 5-year-old's stellar performance and helped her enjoy what was going to be a great day. She is 5 after all. Instead he gave her a story of how leaders can go for the wrong win.
 
Think of it this way ... In your pursuit of success make sure you are actually being successful.

• Success is setting policies in place that reward good sales not moving numbers to get the reward.

• Success is setting policies in place so teams are rewarded for collaboratively getting the goal instead of creating a culture of finger pointing.

• Success is helping a team member improve and develop through coaching instead of receiving a bad annual review after a year with minimal to no feedback.

You want to be first. Who doesn’t? Be first in what matters.

Love your life at work. Help your team love life at work.
Love your life at home. Help your team leave work in a way that helps them engage in life after work.

It's what we strive to do best at Insight Leadership Group.
 
Three Opportunities to Consider [learn more: ryan@insightlg.com]

1. Manager Development: Register your managers for our Courageous Manager’s Virtual Cohort launching in the Spring 2023. Watch for new dates coming soon.

2. Executive Development: Sign up for executive coaching.

3. Let us know you are interested in our next Courageous Leaders Executive Experience to help leaders rest, think and prepare to lead well. Distilled coming Spring 2023. See more info below.

My Weekend 911 Story

We quickly swerved around a blown tire flying down I40 and watched an out-of-control SUV barrel into the woods. I yelled to Titus to call 911, as I pulled over immediately, jumped out of the car, and sprinted into the woods while thinking in the back of my mind … what am I going to do to help? I hope he’s okay. What am I going to see?
 
It's wild how everything can change in a matter of minutes. An easy drive listening to Nebraska blow a game against Northwestern was interrupted by a blown tire and crashing car.
 
Have you ever been enjoying your day at work and all of a sudden, a crisis happens? Everything is on fire?
 
What “fire” moments did you deal with last week?

• Was your team equipped to solve it or were you pulled in to save the day?

• Were you able to get the problem resolved?

• What do you wish you knew prior to dealing with the issue?

• Do “fires” keep you from doing what only you can do, on a regular basis?

As a leader there are many times you are pulled into situations that interrupt your day.

• Do you operate like my experience above, sprinting towards the crisis, dialing for help without the competency to fix it?

• Do you operate like the 911 operator taking time out of your day to assess the situation and who to call to help?

• Do you operate like the highway patrolman or EMT flying into save the day because no one else around has the skills to help?

 
The crisis will come. The questions is, how will you navigate it, while continuing to take care of your team and business?
 
After 10 years of providing executive coaching, it’s evident that the healthiest and most effective leaders are able to operate more like the 911 operator. They listen, connect, and go on with their day. Their teams are capable of solving complex problems. High performance leaders don’t have to run to the fire every week.
 
Many of you are pulled into the fires because your managers are not equipped to handle the complex situations. They run towards it with you on the phone. They know they don’t know what to do, but they know they need to be there because it’s the right thing to do.
 
Until you develop your managers you will continue to be pulled out of work that keeps your team and business healthy.
 
The rest of the story:
The driver was shaken up, but thankfully okay. He was able to get out of the car with minimal injuries.
 
Three Opportunities to Consider
Manager Development: Register your managers for our Courageous Manager’s Virtual Cohort launching in October.
Executive Development: Sign up for executive coaching or let us know you are interested in our next Courageous Leaders Executive Experience to help leaders rest, think and prepare to lead well.

3 Keys to Strategic Agility and Change

There are 3 keys to leading with strategic agility and change.  

1. Know Your Business 

1. System Improvement 

1. Trusting Relationship  
    

As I’m typing this, I am practicing agility and quick change at home. The day has not gone according to plan. Has that ever happened to you? Juggling personal life and work life at the same time? We are having our pastor and his family over for an early dinner. The plan was to smoke and grill chicken thighs and legs. That is an easy 1–2-hour, mess free meal, that tastes incredible. A member of my home, whom I love, brought home 2 whole chickens. Luckily, I left the reserve at lunch, fired up the smoker and now we are having smoked beer can BBQ chicken. Yes, the meal will be incredible, but it is a bit more work. The switch was frustrating, but easy because I know how to make the change without thinking twice. Honestly – the hardest part was practicing Relationship Intelligence!  

Know Your Business  

A few weeks ago, I was driving home and google maps had multiple route options displayed. Without knowing the roads or the area very well I had to slow down, pull over, and review the information before making the best decision to get home.  

I did not know the area so I could not make the right decision on where to go.  

Your ability to be agile is directly connected to how well you know your business. Your experiences matter--where you’ve been, where you are, and where you are going. If you don’t know your business, you can’t practice agility when a need to change arises. Great leaders can be strategic on the fly. We are shifting goals we are shifting how to accomplish the goal. (i.e. – Great dinner is still the goal. It's just what we are having that changed). Your business does not always have time for you to pull reports, have meeting after meeting, form a committee and meet a quorum before a vote. Business moves too quickly to crawl. Know your business so you can practice agility without losing yourself.  

Keep tabs on your roadblocks, goals, and metrics. Know what your people are working on and their progress so you can quickly and accurately speak to their bandwidth.  

Having this knowledge will help you remain strategic and agile.  

System Improvement 

Twenty years ago, I could run circles (or at least hold my own) around most anyone on the pitch. My body (systems) were agile enough to shift directions, pick up speed and remain in position to compete. Fast-forward to now … I’m in the backyard with my boys and I cannot keep up. They shift directions every two seconds, and my kneecaps feel like they are going to pop. My system does not work, and I am no longer as agile!  

If you have been in business for long you know some systems work better than others. This could be a computer system, program, or internal process you are leveraging to get work done. Some systems bog down the ability to be agile and implement quick change.  

Great leaders recognize when something is not working and instead of practicing insanity, they implement wisdom. They change what is not working to improve efficiency, opportunity, and to accomplish goals. Systems exist to support the business, not slow it down. If you have systems (mindsets, programs, processes) that are keeping you from being agile – fix your systems.  

Trusting Relationships  

When a leader is driving for quick change and asking team members to be agile, the health of the relationship will influence the cultural health of the organization.  

If the leader does not have the trust of the team, they will lead forward reluctantly and the culture, as well as results, will create an “us” vs. “them” mentality.  

If the leader practices Relationship Intelligence and has the trust of the team, they might be a bit anxious, but they will not cultivate an “us vs “them” because they are bought in. Leaders – if you need your organization to be more agile to drive for results the first thing you need to do is take a temperature check of your relationships and lean in. I promise that if you lead forward without trust, you will not enjoy where your leadership takes you.  

Leaders – Know your Business. Improve Your Systems. Build Trusting Relationships and you will be set up to be agile and lead through change.  

If you need coaching or training to help you and/or your leaders with agility and change, set up a call and let’s talk through options that work for you and your business.

Roots and Resilience

Last week in a matter of three hours we experienced a flat tire, a broken windshield, and an ER visit to Arkansas Children's. Just a typical Thursday night... Those three experiences were not directly connected, but they were far from enjoyable!  

We've all had one of those days. One of those seasons. When, no matter how hard we try to make everything work right, something goes wrong.  

This happens at work often. A key leader forgets a key aspect on a project. A rising star manager accepts a role in a different organization. A vendor you rely on doesn't follow through. A computer stops working. A marketing strategy flopped. A team member gets COVID right before a big pitch. 

You get the picture: a day or a season when things do not go as planned.

Sometimes when those things happen I start to think: "What did I do wrong?" "Is this punishment for...?" "Does this mean I shouldn't move this direction?" Have you felt that? 

Then I wake up to reality and remember life happens and it is going to be okay. 

I'll tell you what--when "life happens" and my roots are deep, I'm much more resilient. I stay focused on my goals and keep pursuing them in-spite of what I cannot control. When I'm not in a healthy place, when my roots are shallow, it's much easier to let the circumstances thwart my purpose. 

There's a direct correlation between our roots and our resilience. Just like a tree. I remember pretending to not watch, "A Walk in the Clouds" with my wife. At the end of the movie after a vineyard fire, Keanu Reeves ran to the original vine, dug up the roots and saved the family vineyard. Because of the strength and health of the roots, the vineyard was going to be okay. It was resilient. The strength and health of the roots is the key to its resiliency.

How do you gain strong roots as a leader? 
1) Rest | Take time to rest as a leader. Stop running on fumes. Date your spouse, play with your kids and leave your phone in the other room when you do. Spend time being active and be healthy.
2) Relationships | Take time to invest in authentic friendships with people who care about your marriage, your family, and your purpose. Invest in people who build you up, encourage you, and are there for you. Be that for someone and make sure someone is being that for you. 
3)  Purpose | Take time to clarify what's most important in this season of life and be proud of how you live with that focus in mind. Live life with purpose and be proud of the trail you are blazing. 

The relationship between your roots and your resilience, as a leader, is key. When you are rested, have healthy relationships and are living with purpose and things don't go your way, you will be resilient and stay the course.  When your roots are shallow (you're on fumes, you have no real relationships, and you can't clarify your purpose) it's going to be easier for the next crisis to guide you off the trail. 

If you are a senior leader who needs stronger roots you need to seriously consider prioritizing participating in our Courage and Conviction Leadership Series. The next experience is Aug 24-26 in Dallas--Green.

What's Next?

Let's meet up for a virtual coffee to talk about what's happening in your world and figure out the best next steps to address it: https://calendly.com/insightleadership/virtualcoffee 

Lesson 4: The Joy of Celebration

Over the past 4 weeks, one truth has become increasingly clear. Leaders are missing out on one of the greatest aspects of leadership - Celebration.
 
Why is that?
 
Truth: Many leaders are wearing themselves out because they are not getting out of the way. (This stings a bit, but it might be true for me, too!)
Truth: Many team members are leaving your organization because they are tired of not having the opportunity to leverage their strengths.
 
Leaders - We have good intentions. Everything gets busy. We just get it done. We make it happen. It’s faster. But, then, the follow-up (the actual work) has to take place and no one on the team is ready to carry it on.
 
Hence … you miss the joy of celebration.
 
If you are staying up late doing what your team members should be doing, you are not celebrating. You are setting everyone up for failure. You have to learn to train, delegate and empower.
 
One the greatest rewards of a leading is celebrating the growth and opportunity of our team members.
 
You celebrate when milestones are hit, goals are met, or tasks are done at a high level.
 
Then you celebrate in a way that in meaningful for your team members. That’s another thing I love about the SDI 2.0. The Core Strengths platform and Outlook Plug-in provide clear tips on how to encourage a team member who is not wired up like me.
 
We need to make sure we set team members up for success and celebrate them.
We need to make sure we celebrate our team members in a way that makes them feel valued and appreciated.

The sense of gratitude, joy and confidence that welled up in Titus after he successfully rode the motorcycle was well worth the effort to set him up for success. 

What's Next?

Let's meet up for a virtual coffee to talk about what's happening in your world and figure out the best next steps to address it: https://calendly.com/insightleadership/virtualcoffee 

Lesson 3: 3 Keys to Letting Go and Empowering Leaders

Why do we hold tightly to some things and let go so easily of others? For example:

• When my boys were old enough to load and unload the dishwasher – we were ready to let go! Yes, we had to show them how to rinse and load correctly.

• When a team member was ready to manage sending mail chimp newsletters for Insight – yes, I’ll let go.

Some aspects of our life at home and work are easy to delegate and empower others to take on, but other things we cling to like we are trying to run next to a motorcycle to hold it up.
 
When Titus started riding the motorcycle, I couldn’t keep up with him and it was a bit terrifying. There was nothing I could do if something went wrong. I couldn’t answer his questions. If he started to fall, I couldn’t catch him. If there was a barrier he got to before my arrival, I couldn’t remove it. Letting go was terrifying.
 
I was proud of him and nervous all at the same time. He was going too fast for me to hold on and keep a semblance of control.
 
I think that’s the key. We want the leaders we empower to move too fast for us to hold on. If we are holding on, we are in control … that means we are never fully empowering anyone. That keeps us from doing what only we can do and it keeps our team members from reaching their potential.
 
If you want your business to grow you need to stop holding on when employees are ready for you to let go.  

Here are 3 keys to actually empowering leaders:

1. Show them | Effective leaders model the way. They set the example. The first thing you need to do is take the time to show them how to do what you want them to do. Show them the details, the nuances, the process.

2. Watch them | Take the time to let your team member show you how they can perform the task, the project, etc.. This does not mean you are standing over their shoulder, but you need to build in moments for the team member to show you how they are thinking, why they made the choices they made, and how they are pursuing successful results. Make any needed corrections and let them work on it again.

3. Celebrate them | When the goal is set and met – celebrate. Celebrate not only with a great coffee or lunch, but also by choosing to not sneak in and do those tasks any longer. This is a hard one for me. Yes – you can do the job, but if we keep on stepping in, we will never experience the joy of developing our leaders and we will always be holding ourselves back from reaching our full potential.

 
Sidenote: If you need help learning to coach instead of chase give us call.

Lesson 2: Learning to Coach Not Chase

Many of us can remember teaching our kids or nephews to ride a bike. We would hold the back of the seat and run until the kids had balance and could go. At some point in the process, they would pedal faster than we could run while bending over and trying to breathe! We either coach and let them ride or run until we can’t and hold our kids back.
 
Why do we have this need to chase instead of coach? Maybe not a literal chase at work …

• Do you ever look over your direct report's shoulders?

• Do you ever take over key tasks instead of empowering the team?

• Do you ever micro-manage and lose focus of what’s really important?

When I was coaching Titus to ride my Yamaha VStar 650 my first reaction when he took off was to chase him. My first response when he was moving quickly on a motorcycle was to run after him. I thought if he made a mistake maybe I could help. The more he rode, the more I ran; the more I ran, the more exhausted I became.

There came a point when I couldn’t keep up. When I stopped chasing and started coaching the exhaustion gave way to celebration. Instead of holding him back by chasing him I could set more goals and keep coaching him.

If you are a people leader who feels like:

• The only way you can move people forward is by remaining cold and focused on the business

• The only way you can drive for results is if you are abrasive and don’t waiver

• The only you can make sure something is correct is if you self-sacrifice and stay up “fixing it”

When we learn to stop chasing and begin coaching we get to rest.
The people we have the opportunity to lead get to enjoy the ride and develop.
 
Make the shift to coach instead of chase.
 
Sidenote: If you need help learning to coach instead of chase give us call.

4 Key Lessons From a Control Freak Learning to Empower Leaders

While teaching Titus (my 16-year-old son) to ride a motorcycle, I was reminded of 4 key lessons that directly correlate with empowering leaders to learn a new skill and execute that skill without direct oversight. (Before you question my sanity – we live in an area with no through traffic and a 200-yard stretch of straight road)

We were enjoying a quiet Father’s Day around the house and I was getting restless. I took the kids to church, watched Wall-E with Alice, kicked the ball with the boys and it was only 2:30! There was too much time left in the day …

I started to think about the lessons I would leave my children. What legacy would I leave and what life lessons do I need to instill so they can live a full life?

We’ve been talking about selling our motorcycle, because I want to live a long life, but we have not sold it yet! So … it was time to teach Titus how to ride. He was wisely hesitant, but quietly excited.

This four part blog series will cover:

Lesson 1: Effective Training is Difficult
Lesson 2: Looking Over the Shoulder is Exhausting
Lesson 3: Letting Go is Terrifying
Lesson 4: Celebration is Rewarding

Lesson 1: Effective Training Is Difficult

Have you have ever attempted to train someone who didn’t have a clue, but they didn’t know they didn’t know? Yeah – me too. You need them to learn this skill, but they don’t realize how critical it is until they can’t figure it out. They are compliantly going through the process, but we all know the difference between taking ownership and going through the motions.

Titus was excited about the idea of learning to ride, but was humoring me in the process. He said more than once, “if I ever need to figure it out; I’ll just figure it out, it’s not that hard in the movies”. This was followed up by Titus letting up on the clutch too quickly and only being able to move the bike about 6.8 feet per try after 48 tries.

Compliance began to give into to frustration. I knew he would love riding and feel proud of himself if he could be successful, but he was about to give up. The sun was beating down on us and the helmet was heating up. I was committed to his success, even when he was ready to give up. I kept on setting small goals on how far he could go without “killing” the bike. He was so close to success, but closer to giving up.

You have a team member right now who you are trying to develop. There is a system, a process or a method you want them to master so they can be successful, but for some reason they are stubbornly trying to do it their own way. It’s like the salesperson who isn’t putting notes in salesforce. It’s the developer who is not willing to adopt the same methodology and when someone else has to make a change it’s an expensive, painstaking process. It’s the account manager who is great, but no one else can come in after them because they don’t follow the system. The individual performance of everyone is good, but they don’t see how following the process can improve their future and the organization.

We have to wait for those moments to set them up for success.

Titus was about to give up and I persuaded him to try once more.  He hopped on the bike to turn it around. During the U-turn I realized he was trying to start and restart in second gear. I do this all the time, but for his first time riding, it was a little too difficult. I explained what happened and put the bike in first gear. He rolled his eyes as he reluctantly hopped on.

Then it happened. The minor shift in gear, made it possible for everything to click for him. He started cruising. Satisfaction covered his face. The sweat was now worth it and he valued the process.

What does this have to do with you?

• Insight 1: Just because you have goals for your team members, doesn’t mean they will pursue those goals with all their heart!

Tip: You must stay positive and keep working so they see the benefit of where you are taking them.

• Insight 2: The end goal might be overwhelming to think about.

Tip: Set smaller milestone goals in place and help the team member find small wins--keeping hope alive and building confidence.

• Insight 3: Shifting the process slightly or changing the environment can make a huge difference in a leader finally finding success. Remember, you are a pro and a team member's barrier might not seem relevant to you in the moment.

Tip: Assess progress and remove potential barriers you overlooked in the beginning.

My "Masters Moment"

2005

For years I had driven by Augusta National, while visiting my dad at the bank he worked at in Georgia. In the middle of town is one of most iconic golf courses in the world and you can't see it from the streets. Walking through the gates is like stepping back in time to a different world. In 2005, I finally had the opportunity to see the Masters in person. The night before the practice round, storms came rolling in. As we drove through town the next day, trees were down, branches were everywhere and water was pooled up on the streets. We walked through the gates at the course, and it was as if the storm never happened. Employees picked up every twig, blowers dried every puddle, and the course was immaculate.

Uncle Ray, My dad and I walked around, stood at AMEN corner for awhile and took it all in as Tiger Woods navigated his way to another Green Jacket.

During this incredible experience of rest and nostalgia my mind was racing about what was next. Meg was pregnant, I had a couple of unique job offers on the table and I was feeling the pressure to make the right decision quickly. (You know - I'm a "Red" who goes "Red" in Conflict Stage 1.)

If only I could go back and tell my self that it would all work out and I should just soak it all in. If only I could have just rested and fully appreciated the moment.

We have all been there with our families. Maybe not August National, but on vacation. We are supposed to be enjoying the moment and yet we are focused on the next deal, the next phase of a project, the next run in with the challenging team member.

It's time to make the shift as leaders to make sure we help our team members do the same. It's time we stop missing our "Masters Moments". It's time we start making sure our team members experience their "Masters Moments".

We know that you might want more than two tips on how to solve this problem and improve your strategic communication That's why we have created "Green" It's an immersive leadership golf experience that will take place June 15-17 in Dallas, TX. Check out the flyer here.

What's Next?
Let's meet up for a virtual coffee to talk about what's happening in your world and figure out the best next steps to address it: https://calendly.com/insightleadership/virtualcoffee 

Elite 8 Wins and Losses

Are You Still Leading In Crisis Mode?

We saw it last week during the Sweet 16 and Elite 8. Under pressure some teams stayed true to the process and other teams fell apart under Crisis. There is a stark difference between crisis mode and staying competitive as leaders. Our teams would probably agree.

Just like our families appreciate us talking to them in a calm, clear, and respectful manner - our teams do as well. It helps everything work a little bit better because everyone feels honored.

Many leaders across the country are still communicating to their organizations in crisis mode and are struggling on how to make the strategic shift without losing momentum. Meaning we cast quick messages throughout the organization instead of cascading messages and gaining buy-in from the right leaders at the right time. We bypass leaders who need to champion the cause in the name of speed and run out of fuel to see it through because they don't know how to get there teams to buy-in.

Let me belabor my point by saying the same thing twice

When we blast messages without cascading them we generate unneeded anxiety. At this point we also cause our leaders to feel devalued. They feel like their opinions aren't considered and instead of championing projects and change they respond to frustrated individual contributors with age ole "they said". We know nothing motivates a team to work hard like a good old, "we don't have an option or opinion". Hence ... the great resignation.

During the past two years our people have navigated enough personal crisis and don't need us to add to it at work. Creativity, engagement, and inspiration occurs more in the calm than the crisis. Don't overlook the word, "engagement"!

Here are two insights to help:
1) Create a priority of list of what needs to be communicated and why.
2) Create a timeline of who needs to hear the each message first so they can have time to process how to champion the priorities. Be sure to build time to adjust plans accordingly based on feedback.

The key is that we learn to slow down so that we can go fast together. So we can make sure we only operate in crisis mode when there is a full crisis.

We know that you might want more than two tips on how to solve this problem and improve your strategic communication That's why we have created "Green" It's an immersive leadership golf experience that will take place June 15-17 in Dallas, TX. Check out the flyer here.

What's Next?
Let's meet up for a virtual coffee to talk about what's happening in your world and figure out the best next steps to address it: https://calendly.com/insightleadership/virtualcoffee 

 

The Flat Tire Fiasco

The week I turned 16, I remember convincing my dad to let me take his car, instead of my aerodynamic'88 Ford Aerostar van, to take my friend Ryan Malone home. So far my driving record was clean - after 3 days so what could go wrong? Well ... it turns out if you drive too fast over an improperly installed grate on the road you can lose the ability to steer, slide over the large curb and turn all 4 wheels sideways. Yeah ... that was an expensive drive home.

That story is in the back of my mind every time my son, Titus, drives somewhere. He's usually driving our Nissan Frontier 4 Cylinder pickup truck. It goes so fast you have to floor it to get up to the speed limit on the hill by our house. (This makes me feel safer.)

I'd had a long week (7 facilitated session in 5 days) and Meg had two-full days of grad school online. Picture sitting in zoom class from 10 a.m. - 6:30 p.m. and try not to be jealous. Needless to say we were not wanting to prep dinner.

Titus was about to do anything he could to avoid going to pick up dinner so I dropped the one golden ticket I had. The opportunity to take my car. His eyes lit up, jaws dropped and he said, "are you serious?" Then I started to rethink my offer, but doubled down so I could watch the game and sit. We ordered Slim Chickens for pick up and he set out on his first lone journey in the Audi.

On his way home my phone rang and he was in a church parking lot with our dinner and flat tire. My mind was racing. Did the tire get slashed - No we live in Fayetteville, AR. Did Titus ramp a curb on accident - no, he's better than that. Did he attempt some donuts in the church parking lot - no, he's not me. Then the conversation with Chad popped back in my mind.

A few weeks ago Chad at Firestone let me know that I only had another 6-10,000 miles on those tires. He was right. The warning signs on the tires were there, the expert shared his advice, and I pushed the tires to the limit. Since I saw Chad those tires rolled to Omaha, Kansas City, Tulsa and Little Rock.

Is there an area of your life at home or/and life at work that is wearing out? The signs are there, the experts have weighed in and now it's up to you to respond instead of relying on hope that you have one more day, one more week, one more quarter before you have to address it.

• Do you need to lean into your marriage by letting your spouse know you care more about a healthy marriage than the next business deal?

• Do you need to lean into your kids and let them they are more important than work by spending more time with them?

• Do you need to lean into your health by ordering a grilled chicken salad and walking the block?

• Do you need to lean into your team by investing in their development and your team formation?

• Do you need to lean into your organization by focusing on how to strategically communicate so everyone knows what everyone needs to know?

I'm thankful the tire simply ran flat and did not blow out. A blow out could have put my son in danger and that would have been on me for not responding quick enough to the warning signs and the expert's advice.

If you are running an area of your life on a "tire" that is about to blow. Set a time to talk this week and let's work on the repair before it gets worse.

Pregnant and Moving

Meg was pregnant and we were moving to a new state for a new role. I was excited to dive in and make an impact. There's nothing more fun than moving across the country to meet new friends in a new community while 4.5 months pregnant (sarcasm dripping).

Then it happened. The leader that we agreed to uproot our lives for, showed their true self. The imprint left on us will never be forgotten.

Here’s the truth. How you treat team members at work impacts their life at home. How you treat people at work impacts a team member's marriage. How you treat people at work impacts how a team member invests in their children. How you treat a team member at work impacts how they invest in the community- serving on boards, coaching kids teams and volunteering at church. Everyone makes their own choices, but as leaders - you have tremendous influence. Everyone has a choice in how they respond. Leaders can make help others or hurt others.

Take a moment and replace the words “team member” with the names of the people on your teams. Let it soak in.

How you treat ___________ at work impacts their life at home. How you treat _________ at work impacts ___________'s marriage. How you treat __________ at work impacts how __________ invests in their children. How you treat ____________ at work impacts how they invest in the community- serving on boards, coaching kids teams and volunteering at church.
Here’s what I’m saying. It’s not just all about you. Now, it's about your team.

How you lead/manage has a ripple effect into the community. Your words, your tone, your expectations, your feedback, your timelines, your encouragement, your intentionality – make a huge difference.
I know it’s heavy responsibility. You’ve got this though. Your leadership impacts a persons life. That’s why it’s important to think through what type of impact you want to make with your responsibility.
Take a moment to do this exercise:

• How do you want the people you manage to remember you?

• What do you need to do differently so everyone on your team might remember you that way? (I say “might” because you can't control how others respond.)

Remember – all you can do, is what you can do. You can’t control what others do or feel. Don’t let that reality take away from you being the leader you want to be. There will be times you have to get critical feedback, let team members work somewhere else, or be accused of ridiculous things with no merit.

My prayer for you and for everyone I work with is that you navigate leadership challenges in such a way that allows you to lay your head on your pillow at night without regret or shame. Be proud of who you are and how you lead. Be a leader worth following and and leave a legacy worth remembering. Leaders who leave a legacy worth remembering have four things in common.

1. Humility

   • C.S. Lewis said, “Humility is not thinking less of yourself it’s thinking of yourself less.” Leaders who lead with humility don’t lord a title over others to push ideas through. They lead by influence to share a vision, idea, or opportunity that everyone can rally behind. Humble leaders celebrate others in lieu of themselves.

2. Empathy

   • Learning to look and see from someone else's perspective is life changing. I might not agree with their perspective, but when I see it, when I feel it, when I put myself in their shoes (even if those shoes are uncomfortable) I adjust my approach to make sure that team member knows I hear, value and appreciate them. I might not give the team member what they want, but I can still lead with empathy.

3. Selfless Ambition

   • Your team has goals and sometimes people make it difficult to pursue those goals. Your role as a leader is to get up the mountain. Your role is to accomplish whatever is in front with no excuses as at team. Leaders who leave a legacy worth remembering leave an outcome that moved the needle forward for the team and organization while benefiting the teams personal lives.

What's Next?
If you need a refresher on your SDI 2.0 or you are wanting to improve the culture and communication in your organization, or you just want to have a conversation set up a virtual coffee: https://calendly.com/insightleadership/virtualcoffee 

Valentine's Blunder

Some leaders learn lessons quickly and others take awhile. On the SDI 2.0, stubbornness is one of my top overdone strengths. My wife can attest to this. Maybe my team too!

During our Valentine's date, we were talking with our friends about failed opportunities. There was a time when we believed our wives when they said, "We don't want anything." But they wanted something! I can't tell you how many times I thought that meant I shouldn't actually get a gift! Yes ... you can judge me ... just know after 20 years I have gotten better at having a little intuition and Meg has gotten better at making sure she is not relying on my intuition!

One of my favorite movie scenes in The Breakup with Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston is when she yells, "I just want you to WANT to do the dishes!"

This is one more example of how waiting and hoping for intuition is the worst type of communication!

Here's the deal. The workplace is not much different. If you want your expectations to be met - don't rely on someone's intuition to provide you exactly what you want.

If you want to set up your team members for success - communicate with clarity.

Everyone wants to feel valued, heard and appreciated. When we don't communicate with clarity we fill in the gaps with assumptions of what we think we heard or what we think someone wants. And both parties end up with an element of frustration.

If you are someone like me, you might be able to leverage some helpful tools. I can't tell you how many times I have pulled up the SDI 2.0 compare feature on my wife and team to make sure I'm communicating in a clear and helpful way or to make sure I'm effectively hearing what they say. When I understand where they are coming from it helps me know how to respond.

There are three key elements to make sure you are connecting with your team members.
1) Communicate with clarity to your team members by saying what you mean and meaning what you say.
2) Cultivate community with your team members by valuing and appreciating how they show up.
3) Check-In with your team members on a regular basis so you know how to support, equip and develop them.

What's Next?
If you need a refresher on your SDI 2.0 or you are wanting to improve the culture and communication in your organization, or you just want to have a conversation set up a virtual coffee: https://calendly.com/insightleadership/virtualcoffee